Not Quite an Avenger, But "I Can Do This All Day!"

Do you remember that part in the first Avengers movie when Captain America told Dr. Banner (the Hulk) it might be a good time for him to get angry? Banner responds, "I'm always angry!" That's a line and feeling I can relate to—when someone asks if I'm in pain, my response is, "I'm always in pain!" Sounds a bit dark, right? But let's unpack that a bit.

Ever since I was a kid, I've been able to handle pain, often in a somewhat reckless manner. I'd trip and cut myself while playing and still keep going. I didn't want to stop the fun for me or my friends. Looking back, it wasn't the best idea. But those were my priorities then. These childhood adventures have left their marks as scars and stitches. Things got more serious when my lung started to collapse every year, and I had to get a tube put in. I strangely miss those simpler times when all I had to do was rest, heal, and then get the tube taken out. It was scary, especially being so young, but life has changed a lot since then.

Today, I'm deeply humbled and grateful for the person I've become and where I am. I'm amazed at my resilience in navigating through so many challenges and emotions. In these moments, I feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude to God for His divine intervention.

Maybe I’m getting ahead of myself without providing enough context for those who don’t know me.

For the past eight years, I've been in and out of the hospital, undergoing many surgeries and experiments, trying to "fix" my health issue. This started with the removal of a large portion of my lung, resulting in a permanent opening on my side that couldn't be closed.

My daily routine now includes uncomfortably changing dressings several times. That's the simple part. But then there are unpredictable issues such as leaks, bleeding, and cramps, among other things.

Sleeping has become somewhat of a tactical mission. I can either lie on my left side, pressing uncomfortably against the wound, or attempt to sleep uncomfortably on my back like a vampire. My right side becomes an option only for brief periods after changing my dressing. My left shoulder is unhappy with this arrangement and keeps letting me know.

So yes, almost everything hurts! But just like Captain America, the First Avenger, I find myself saying: "I can do this all day." I consciously choose to live, persist, and keep moving forward, refusing to surrender.

Sure, there are days when life delivers a punch that sends me sprawling, days when the pain seems unbearable. But most days, I push through, continually striving for the best.

I do this because it's necessary. After all, it's the only way. Not just for myself but for the ones who stand by me: My parents, sisters, wife, son, extended family, and friends. Their unwavering love and support fuel my resilience, and we brave this storm together.

So, to anyone who reads this, remember that life is an unexpected journey filled with highs and lows. Some days will be hard, and it might feel like too much to handle. But it's on those days that we find our true strength and resilience. Like Captain America, each one of us can say, "I can do this all day." We can push through and endure, no matter the circumstances. 

It's important, however, to remember that asking for help isn't a sign of weakness—it's a strength. We're social beings, and connection is essential to our journey. Reach out to those around you, be open about your struggles, and never hesitate to ask for support. The people who love us often want to help but may not know how unless we let them in. Their support can provide great solace and strength during difficult times.

Remember that it's okay to have tough days, and it's okay to feel pain. These experiences shape us; they make us who we are. Life will throw curveballs at us, surprising us in ways we can't imagine. But those surprises aren't always bad. Sometimes, they're moments of joy, love, and happiness that we didn’t see coming.

So keep going and keep enduring. Stay connected and open up to the love and support around you. You never know what's around the corner. And no matter what, remember, you're not alone, and nothing lasts. We're all on this unexpected journey together, and there's always hope for brighter days.